If Facebook is to believed, everyone you know is having the time of their life. Their days are way more exciting than yours. They have more friends. They have been to more places. They have better stuff than you. They are just so much happier than you.
It’s not true.
We like to show off our strengths; reading a CV or Linkedin profile confirms that.
The fact is I am not the most intelligent person I know. I am not the wisest. I am not the greatest writer or musician. I have more failings that I like to admit to myself and certainly to you.
Some months ago I had to admit, “I can’t do this.”
The job I was doing had changed massively. The volume and nature of the work were pushing me to the limit. I wanted to do a good job. I had reached territory that was beyond me. My physical health, mental health and relationships with my family were being affected.
The relief I felt when I phoned my boss to say, “The doctor has signed me off” was immense. I confessed my limitations. It was freeing. There were no secrets. We were able to make adjustments.
It is a brave thing to admit that we’re not as strong as we’d like people to think we are. We have to remove the mask, let them see our weakness. But there is no more pretence. No more trying to be what we’re not.
This works both ways.
We must be open about ourselves. We must also accept that those around us, particularly our spouse, may not be as strong as we imagine them to be.